Prangster in Chicago

People, it's June...

It's Wednesday today (almost 3am right now) and it's another brilliant public holiday in Asia. Cause it's Dragonboat festival or whatever. It's the day when people eat rice and other miscellaneous ingredients wrapped in long leaves and tied together with string. I've tried to say it in Chinese a few times but I keep getting it mixed up with the day when people eat moon cakes instead. Wishing people "Happy Moon Festival!" when it's not the freaking moon festival isn't very cool. Anyhow, the important thing is I don't have to wake up early and catch a taxi to the office because I'm too freaking lazy to take the bus. Yeah!

For some weird reason, it's just days away from June yet it's been cold and pouring down with rain these past few days. Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining at all. I actually break into cheerful giggles whenever I get a chill from the wind. But you know what? It's freaking weird. I should be self-flagellating from delirium caused by heatstroke already, but instead, I'm so comfy. And so is the rest of Taipei. The air is buzzing around, the atmosphere is getting some exercise and the city is as cool as a cucumber. Oh happy days. How long this will last, I have no idea.

But gosh, it's just days away from June. This time last year I was just getting ready to get on a plane and go to Europe. Spend a little time and see some familiar faces. I was so freaking excited, so overwhelmed with anticipation of all the big changes coming my way that I didn't even get a chance to miss what I was leaving behind. Back then, every day was a countdown to something new. A year later, it's a little bit different. Each day simply brings me one day closer to the weekend...and some much needed sleep.

Cough cough

Yesterday marked the first occasion I wore a facemask on the way to work. How Asian of me. No, there isn't any SARS around and I'm not sick. I pretty much just got tired of inhaling toxic air every day. I must say it felt kinda weird, like the first time I wore boy-leg underwear. Then today I read this article on CNN about ultrafine pollutants in the atmosphere causing respiratory illnesses in Greater China. It's great to live in Taipei!

Here's an example of a Dot Com Era beggar. Nice logo design.

Onion soup to die for

Wow, what a good day today was. Thanks, world. At work, Matt and I put together a great naming presentation in record time and the client seemed to like it. Now we have two names on the shortlist and for the first time in a long while, I like them both. Usually clients shortlist names I can't stand and refuse ownership of. After work, I was motivated enough to go to the gym for the first time in over a month, maybe two (jesus) and this may be a bit of overshare, but I finally, finally bought some new bras. You must understand, it's freaking hard to buy new bras in Taipei. Almost all of them are padded and flowery and crap. Or the French brands I buy are over NT$3000 (A$130) each. Ironically, I bought these new ones from Esprit, which is where I bought my first bra ever! Okay, that was definitely overshare. Ahem.

Photo breakdown: Over the weekend, Dad and I went to this new restaurant that opened in the building next to ours. It's called Cello Gourmet (there's a Cello Pasta branch by the office too) and it's one of those fancy restaurants that doesn't have a menu but asks you what you'd like to eat and the chef tries to make you happy. Or if he doesn't, he'll be really disappointed in himself and commit seppuku. Dad and I had noodles for lunch. He got the Chinese-style beef noodles and I got clam with asparagus pasta. We got really delicious soups as entree. This is Dad's onion soup. It was much more delicious than my mushroom soup.

The good and the ugly

Let's forget about the national humiliation that happened last week when the Taiwanese president basically threw himself at Laura Bush (twice!) and acted like a middle-aged white woman running into Oprah Winfrey on the street. Let's just wipe it from our collective memories for a moment. Okay, so Time Magazine's Best of Asia edition is out this week. According to this, Taiwan counts as the best in Asia under two categories: Best Underrated Pacific Holiday and Best Esoteric Publication. What? Is Time Magazine trying to be cute? Is it trying to be innovative by coming out with these categories no one gives a crap about? It must be. Here is a brief list I've compiled that fills the gaps left by those fools at Time:

Best Night Market: Tun Hua St
Best Place to Get a Stomach Bug: Tun Hua St
Best Place to View an Air Pollution Blanket: Taipei 101
Best Food Stand Right Outside Smelly Public Toilets: Zhong Xiao Wonton Stand
Longest Waiting Line in Taipei: Zhong Xiao Wonton Stand (Um, sometimes I go too because the wontons are that good. But possibly extremely unhygenic, I know.)
Best Place to See 50-Year-Old Fat, Bald American Men with Slutty-Looking 25-Year-Old Taiwanese Women: Carnegies
Best Place to See Okay-Looking Guys: At Eslite Bookstore. Also NY Bagel.
Best Place to See Hot Guys: At Eslite Bookstore. In the pages of American GQ.

And what else is Taiwan the best at? Forcing strangers into awkward handshakes when they are obviously trying to avoid it by clapping wildly. I saw the video footage of the idiot president hand-raping Laura Bush and believe me, it wasn't pretty.

M-Day

The land and the sea

Usually manhole covers in Taipei are dog ugly, but this one in the alley behind my apartment block is cute. Of course, it doesn't compare to manhole covers in Japan, but it's pretty good for Taipei.

Normality

We are all back where we are supposed to be and it's no fun. Three weeks ago I got back from Tokyo. Two weeks ago I was jobhunting; packing hypothetical suitcases for places like Hamburg, London, Amsterdam. One week ago I gave up the denial and accepted the fact that I'm working, living and inhaling  toxic pollution in Taipei and yeah, it's going to be unbearably hot here for the next three months. At least. The air conditioner in my room -- my seasonal best friend -- is back to coughing out glorious cool air and cancelling out the heat generated by my notebook and its borderline obsession with downloading. I started with the cold showers a few days ago. Is it weird that my coworkers said they still have hot showers in this weather? I think so.

Canon cheated

People who care may recall that I was crazy excited to buy a new digital camera in Tokyo. Those people have good memories because I did buy a new digital camera on that trip -- a Canon Ixy 65 -- but I am no longer crazy excited about it. Why? Because it's a crappy camera, that's why. The Ixus 400 I got in 2003 takes clearer and brighter photos. I was so disappointed after getting back from Tokyo I put the new camera back in its box, I put the box back on my shelf and I didn't play with it for a week. Almost two. I didn't even stick the clear plastic protective film over the screen.

Today I went to the fruit store after work and decided to give the Canon Ixy 65 another chance. The photos it took are just okay. The colors are average, the lines are kinda fuzzy in full size, so it's still sub-standard for a Canon. That'll teach me about brand loyalty. I'm going to take out my contact lenses now and then stare into space until my eyes dry out. Excuse me.

An ode to Taipei summers

An Ode to Taipei Summers

It's creeping towards summer in Taipei.
The stinky, sticky, peel-your-pants-off kind.
The heavy air is welcoming back all the signature smells of the city:
the garbage, the pollution, the random stench of urine and rotten-egg that rises from street gutters.
The monsoonal rain creates deep, dirty puddles which inevitably splash onto surprised pants whenever a Taipei Death Bus roars past.
Whoever said they enjoy Taipei in the summertime must have moved here from Hades.

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