Prangster in Chicago

Taipei leftovers

Red bean dumplings from Din Tai Fong. This place is one of my must-eats in Taipei.


The sake selection at the new Mitsui store/restaurant.


Fishies in the prepared foods section at Mitsui.


One of my fave spots in the world for chips: "Ireland's Potato" in Taipei. I only ever order the honey mustard dressing. It's so delish. Just don't look at the fryers they use. You might puke. Another plus is they sell Miller High Life there. Yes, the champagne of beers.

Small and bright vs. big and gloomy

No, I'm not talking about the U.S. election. I'm talking about my living situation. And I'm thinking maybe I'll move again. Same area, just one block north of where I am now. Why? Because I'm trying to make it my new tradition. Moving right after Thanksgiving like I did last year. Well, there's more to it than that. Remember, I'm the person who wrote a 900-word post about buying an iPod Touch. (Hello, iPod Touch! I love you!) I have another month or so to decide before my current lease runs out, so here's a list of pros and cons. Maybe you can throw in your vote at the end?

Pros of moving to the new place:

1. The natural light in the new place is blinding. In an awesome, uplifting, the world is beautiful and we are all fortunate children of the earth way. Natural light would be a nice change.
2. Rent at the new place will be $775/month. So the same as what I pay now. If I renew my current lease, rent will jump to $810. It was supposed to be $820, but I got those moneysuckers down $10 cause I'm a scrappy haggler like that.
3. The rent at the new place includes high-speed Internet and cable TV.
4. Cable TV package includes HBO.
5. HBO is priceless.
6. New place will be closer to the Belmont El stop, but still on a quiet lovely street.
7. The elevator in the building is new and doesn't smell.
8. I will move out from under the giant (or giantesse) who stomps around upstairs all the time.
9. The brothers who own the building are flexible with the length of the lease. Apparently, "breaking up with a boyfriend" is sufficient reason to break a lease. Current place won't budge. It has to be one year. Losers.
10. The new place is literally one block north of my current place. Theoretically, this means I could move everything myself using a pushcart.
11. There's natural light in the bathroom too. And it's beautiful.

Cons:

1. The new place makes the studio I live in now look like a mansion. It's about half the size. That's the only problem. And I know it's not like I'm really tall or have a lot of stuff, but why does it have to be so small? The main living area is probably 8x10 ft. And the bathroom and kitchen area are both small too. It's the perfect size for my teddy bear and his teddy bear to live in. But not me and my teddy bear and my teddy bear's teddy bear.

Hrm.

I am about to cry with pride-like emotion

An article published in the New York Times today about Taipei's food scene has me on the verge of tears. It's got me nodding in agreement, as if a translator has finally cracked the code. My neighborhood joint Ao Ba gets a mention and a photo in the gallery. It's always on the shortlist whenever we brainstorm places to eat.

Here's a few paragraphs:

"Hidden in plain sight, popular but light-years from trendy, surprisingly accessible and instantly enjoyable, Old Wang is also a perfect metaphor for Taipei, the Chinese capital you haven’t heard much about in 2008. This was, after all, Beijing’s moment in the sun, with the Olympic Games giving it the opportunity to strut its stuff on the world stage.

And Taiwan? The little democratic island of 23 million just can’t compete with the Communist state of 1.3 billion that claims it as a renegade province and would react unfavorably if Taiwan’s leaders were officially to declare independence. Unless you’re in the semiconductor business, chances are you’ll choose the Forbidden City over, say, the Chiang Kai-shek Memorial, especially when Taiwan’s tourist bureau promotes it with slogans like “Taiwan: Touch Your Heart.”

Which is a pity if you like to eat, for food is one arena where Taipei — the world’s most underrated capital city, according to Monocle magazine — blows Beijing away. Its food incorporates more influences, spans street food to haute cuisine with greater aplomb and is out and out more delicious than that of its mainland counterpart."

Read the rest here.

Workie workie

I've been part of the team that puts together monthly features for GE.com since I started working here last year. It's always interesting to work on these. In the past we've learned about nanotechnology, the healthcare industry and technologies that help deal with water scarcity. The one that launched yesterday is about their aviation business. Lots of awesome planes and air show footage in the video. Take a look on GE.com if you're so inclined. It'll be on the home page for a month before it's swapped out for the next one. Then it'll be archived forever and ever over here alongside the rest.

Those babies cry again

Something huge is happening on Wall Street right now. Bankruptcies and the like. Huge events that are making those cry baby traders sniffle once again. I don't really know what's going on...I just update my Cry Baby Traders blog like the productive robot that I am.

Family matters

Literary characters are losing their identities. Especially women. They all belong to someone else now. Have you been to a bookstore lately? So many new release titles have "wife" in them. I recently finished reading Time Traveler's Wife (loved it) and started to notice this silly trend. Just this year there's been The Zookeeper's Wife, The Senator's Wife, The Saturday Wife, The River Wife, The Spare Wife and The Diplomat's Wife. And that's not even counting the romance novels with cheesy covers.

But it's even more ridiculous with daughters. I did a search on Amazon to see how many daughters have been or are being released this year. Turns out there's enough to fill a sewing class:

Emotionally unstable daughters
The Mistress's Daughter
The Narcissist's Daughter
Pandora's Daughter
The Imposter's Daughter

Miscellaneous daughters
Somebody Else's Daughter
Midnight's Daughter
The Hummingbird's Daughter

Daughters separated at birth
The Gravedigger's Daughter
The Ditchdigger's Daughters

Daughters who will run away from home
The Bishop's Daughter
The Heretic's Daughter
The Killer's Daughter

Daughters who would like to run away but can't
The Pirate's Daughter
The President's Daughter

Olde world daughters
The Bonesetter's Daughter
The Memory Keeper's Daughter
The Horsemaster's Daughter
The Apothecary's Daughter

Daughters who help out on the weekends
The Florist's Daughter
Glass Maker's Daughter
The Fortune Teller's Daughter

The daughter who will never live up to expectations
The Musician's Daughter

So, so, so...

The pocket-protected physicists of the world will be playing pinball with sub-atomic particles in France and Switzerland later tonight to recreate every Trekker's ultimate fantasy. If you have no idea what I'm talking about, watch this surprisingly informative rap produced by the physicists of the pinball machine, a.k.a. the Large Hadron Collider. Remember when I went on a work trip and one of the speakers was the physicist, Lisa Randall? Well, her theorem could be proved true by this experiment. She must be about to pee her pants right now. Anyway, some very scared people are worried this experiment could possibly create "mini black holes" with very short lifespans that could suck out the entire Earth. And perhaps spit it out into a bag of marbles. The idea is just crazy enough to work.

So three questions for you, my friends:

1. If Earth gets sucked into a black hole tomorrow, what would you do on your last night?

2. If you could forever get rid of something by throwing it into a "mini black hole", what would it be?

3. This one's for Anthony Bourdain: What would you eat as your final meal on Earth?

I'd like to say I'd eat these wontons and noodles for the last question, but I don't know if I want to risk one my last smells on Earth being public toilets. It's a tough call.

So I'm going to think of my answers overnight and post them in the comments tomorrow. Or I guess if the Earth's been sucked into the black hole, I'll write it as my status on Facebook.

Good news and bad news

I landed in Chicago last night and I'm back at work this morning.

Let's start with the good news:
- My dark shoebox apartment is just as I left it. In other words, I wasn't robbed. Yessss!
- My African violets are still alive. Yessss!
- The pineapple shortbreads and "sun" cakes I brought back from Taipei (they are what everyone brings from Taipei) were a hit this morning with my coworkers. Yessss!

But here's the bad news:
- There was a letter outside my door last night from the company that manages my building. It said that my rent will bump up to $820 from $775 when my current lease is over. That's $45. Or about two tops on sale from the Gap. Noooo!
- Brinky has changed seats. Now she sits diagonally opposite me instead of right next to me. This means I don't have to turn my head 90 degrees to say something to her and only need to turn it 45 degrees, but I'm already noticing that she's now interrupting Katie with her random comments instead of me. It's making me burn with jealousy. Burrrrn!
- Chicago weather is already starting to cool down. This morning I saw people wearing buttoned up jackets at the train station. That's a bad sign. Noooo!
- My jeans are snug today. I put on two kilos in Taipei. In a week.

:(

My favorite Taipei pastime: restaurant Russian roulette

Taipei restaurants can be clean. They can also be dirty. The food in Taipei can be delicious. But it can also give you explosive diarrhea. The best combination is when the restaurant is clean and the food is delicious. But in special cases, dirty restaurants can produce brilliantly delicious food. This food may or may not give you explosive diarrhea, but most times you have an hour or two to find that out.

I'm giving you this introduction to the Taipei eating scene because yesterday I had lunch with my mum at a place I haven't eaten at in a few years. It's a wonton and noodle stand that is extremely delicious and brilliantly cheap. But unfortunately, it is located in the underground level of an old mall, right next to smelly public toilets. People go to that corner of the mall to line up for the delicious wontons. Or they go to take a leak.

When I lived and worked in Taipei from 2005-06, I used to eat wontons and noodles at this place all the time. I'd go by myself or with friends, sit on a plastic stool, rub shoulders and clang chopsticks with other spicy wonton lovers. Sometimes my seat would be the one closest to the smelly public toilets but I didn't think twice about it. I figured if no one else was put off by the smelly toilets, then it must be okay. Maybe it was the price I had to pay for enjoying the delicious wontons. Or perhaps it was the germ-karma of having very high levels of hygiene in every other area of my life.

When I think about it now -- as someone with self-diagnosed progressive obsessive compulsive disorder related to cleanliness -- I can feel a little lump in my throat that's probably vomit.

So my mum decided we should visit the wonton stand for lunch yesterday. I was apprehensive at first (very, very apprehensive) but then excited because those wontons and noodles really are freaking delicious. They are wontons to dream about. Noodles to demand as your final meal on earth.

But it all turned out okay. We went before the lunch crowd had arrived and sat on the side furthest away from the toilets. We couldn't even see them! It was like they weren't even there. And the wontons were sublime. The noodles were perfect. I took these photos because I was so happy.



As I was enjoying the wontons, I thought about a column I read in the Sydney Morning Herald during the Beijing Olympics that said just about the funniest thing I've read this year: "These games have hardly begun and China have already served up a steaming bowl of pain noodles with a side order of humiliation wontons to the US of A..."

My boyfriend Paul is coming to Taipei

Dear Paul,

I'm so happy you decided to make the leap and join me in Taipei. Long distance relationships are too hard. Oh, right. I live in Chicago now. But I'll be back in December so I'll visit you and your "Henri Quatre" sandwiches then. Seeing you like this, all crunchy and bakery, makes me think back to the days when we used to hang out every week. Back in Evry, remember? I missed you so much!